Dragon-Trainer-Phryne

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

the-swift-tricker:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

alicat-gotyourtongue:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

i love that sirius black escapes azkaban and his first 2 instincts are:

• seek vengeance  
• buy expensive gifts for school children 

If these aren’t your two primary goals following a dramatic escape from a supermax prison— what are you even doing with your life?

“dramatic escape” that bitch literally just walked out

HE SWAM ACROSS THE FUCKING OCEAN AS A DOG I THINK THAT QUALIFIES AS A DRAMATIC ESCAPE

even better he DOG PADDLED OUT

(via saltofthenorth)

insertnerdyjokehere:

twelvety-cans-of-cant:

letsmakeitwrite:

cliché but classic trope: when the person who almost died wakes up in a hospital bed, looks around and sees the object of their affection sleeping uncomfortably in the chair next to them because they haven’t moved in days.

You can pry that trope from my cold dead hands.

cliché but classic sub trope of this: the person who almost died tells the object of their affection “you look like shit” despite the fact that they are the one in the hospital bed and almost died.

(via delectabledelirium)

tlirsgender:

tlirsgender:

tlirsgender:

tlirsgender:

tlirsgender:

Loving how as soon as electricity was like, a Thing, people just went “you can make toast with this” and started working on electric toasters but they didn’t quite have the whole heating element thing down so there was a not insignificant chance of it just exploding

People have been making bread crunchy by heating it up for Ages but for some reason I thought electric toasters would be happening around the same time as like, refrigerators but no people went “easier crunchy bread?” as soon as the technology was available. Not even remotely safe but like, existent. It took Way longer to figure out how to make things cold with electricity

I specify electric toasters because before that they had these bad boys

You just put your slice of bread in there and hold it over your fireplace and bam it’s toast time

Actually you didn’t have to use those, if you find yourself wanting some toast in victorian england you could also stick your bread on one of these motherfuckers right here

These are the very creatively titled (/s) toasting forks and they look metal as hell for the purpose they serve

You might notice that the tips are bent upwards, which is actually not for inflicting more pain when tormenting the souls of the damned but rather because the bread goes on them like so

And the bend helps keep the bread from sliding off

I know this is the most niche interest shit in the world but just look at that. The victorian era had no reason to go as hard as it did but every day I am grateful for it

(via glitter-pear)

swedebeast:

bantarleton:

peashooter85:

Hey people in Scandinavian countries if the UK breaks up due to Brexit the time would be ripe to go a Viking again. Just sayin’

As a Viking descendant I approve this message. 

With that said though, imagine an economic and political coalition between the Scandinavian countries and Scotland.